GRIEF
During this time of crisis due to COVID-19, it feels as if the world has stopped. Shops are closed, people are isolated inside their homes, and places where people go to seek fellowship are empty. What doesn’t stop when everything is shut down? Grief. COVID-19 doesn’t mean that there will be no more deaths related to addiction or natural causes. COVID-19 doesn’t mean we no longer feel loss that we’ve experienced before or during this crisis. It’s more important now than ever to be aware of our own grief and to find new ways to cope with loss.
Grief is painful whether you’re grieving the loss of a loved one, a job, or even the ability to be in the presence of your friends and family. It’s important to take care of yourself during this time and to give yourself some grace! Being isolated can increase feelings of loneliness and depression. Having large amounts of downtime can you leave you dealing with thoughts and feelings that you may not have experienced in quite some time.
During this time of isolation, I have had more time to come to terms with the loss of my brother who passed away due to his addiction last summer. Rather than staying busy to avoid thinking about him or feeling the sadness I still have regarding his death, I have been able to take the time to remember him- the good and the bad- and to talk about my feelings with my loved ones. This has served as a reminder that grief isn’t linear- the pain ebbs and flows. There are days when I bounce between sadness and acceptance and even denial! During this crisis, you may find that some days the feelings are much more difficult to manage than others. Pushing these feelings aside by staying distracted doesn’t make them go away. By allowing yourself to experience grief, you are allowing yourself to slowly process your feelings rather than being blindsided by them when you least expect it.
While we can’t stop grief and loss, we can learn to cope with it. One key way to cope with these feelings is to talk to a trusted friend, loved one, or even a therapist about what you’re feeling! Whether it’s through a phone call or a Zoom meeting, staying in contact with others is key! People need to feel connected with others. By reaching out, you can share your own feelings and receive support during such a difficult time. Taking time to reflect through journaling or meditation can also be helpful in sorting out your thoughts and feelings regarding your loss.
While it may feel tempting to drink or use other substances when you want to escape from your grief, these substances prevent you from coping with loss and only temporarily numb the feelings. If you find yourself abusing substances to numb your feelings, please remember that you are not alone. There are support groups in the community for substance abuse and grief and at The Virtue Center, we are here for you during this difficult time. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help. Please call us at 405-321-0022.
ANONYMOUS
